Disappointment With Ourselves
Perhaps the hardest disappointment we face is when we are disappointed in ourselves. It is certainly the hardest to deal with. We have certain expectations. We have certain standards of conduct. We live by certain ethics. Then, when we come face to face with inconsistencies or even abject failures, disappointment comes crashing down. It is easy to be hard on oneself. And when those failures or hurts affect those we cherish the most, the disappointment is all the more pensive. It is enough to really take you to the dark side of life.
Consider though, is there a person in the Bible, save Jesus, who did not have some failure? Who escaped without hurting others, even themselves? Every person mentioned in the Bible had some flaw or had something that was a glitch on their resume of life. Even the Lord said we are to consider the plank in our eye before we try to remove the splinter in another person’s eye. That is, we have planks that need to be removed. We need to recognize our own weakness and that we have them before we try to point them out in another. From the book of Rickie, “When I become perfect I can then expect perfection in another. But until then recognize we all have flaws and failures.” We are to consider ourselves when helping one overtaken in a fault lest we also be overcome. We can all be overcome. We can all fail.
Therefore, the Bible addresses that people will fall and hurt others, even those we love the most. We will not always be “WHO” we should be. We will not always live by our ethics. We will not always be true to our own standards. We are all guilty and must deal with that disappointment. While we see that those in the Bible had their moments of failure, we do not seek to justify ourselves by their failures but learn from them. How did they grow past them?
Consider Abraham: he certainly had his moments of failure. Yet, when God speaks of him he is called a friend of God and Father of the faithful. Why? Because even though Abraham failed, he is judged over his lifetime by the faith he had in God. He never quit on God, and God never quit on him. When we become disappointed in ourselves we must not give up or quit. It is then our faith is challenged and then we need God.
Further, consider David, called a man after God’s own heart. Yet he did something that was the very opposite of God’s heart. But God forgave him. He paid the consequences of his sins, but God did not give up on him. God did everything He could to restore him. God even sent a prophet to help him see his failure. God wanted David and David wanted God. Nathan helped David see his failure and sometimes we need those who care deeply for us to help us see what we may not. David needed a helping hand. When disappointment smacks us in the face we may want to give up. Like David, cry, “Create in me a clean heart, O God. And renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psa. 51:10).
So what is the lesson? Nobody is perfect. Yet it is our faith and our desire to obey God that enables us to persevere. Our love for Him motivates us to persist. Our will to continue, in spite of failure, transforms us into His image. Yes, there may consequences, even life-long consequences like David had. God looks at us, not in our failure, but what He can make us to be. Yes, we may be disappointed in ourselves, but remember: God sees us for what He can shape and mold us to be.
One more thing: if we have been the recipient of hurt and been disappointed, what if we looked at the one who hurt us in this way?